Change...

Change is always hard, but as the cliché says, it's the only constant, right?

Leaving India was not the thing I wanted to do. Last year while I was there in February, after my time with Sharath was over, I completely allowed myself to fall in love with it and found that it was the only place I wanted to live. But at the time had to go home to make some money to be able to return for the next season with Sharath and of course, that was good that I went. Lots of things changed. This time I also stayed an extra month but was invited to take over my friends Mysore program while she was out of the country, and it's for four months which is a long time. So I'd be living in Germany,which was not in my plan. Not that I plan anything, I go on my feelings and it felt right to say yes when she asked me.

So now, I'm in Germany. My sister took German in school and probably would be able to pick back up on it pretty easily. I took French and so many other romance languages are easy for me to pick up on. Even Kannada (what they speak in Mysore) isn't so hard to figure out what they're talking about to me, even though I don't know it at all. So I'm having a hard time with German. But the area is adorable, streets are mostly brick and the little shops all down the block are pretty great too.

The people are nice, and on the street will often look you in the eye and say "morgen" much like saying morning in the US, but it doesn't often happen on the street. But mostly they also speak English or know enough words to answer your questions about what it is a quiche you may be looking at (yes, this example is from my breakfast experience this morning lol).

But reading a language you have no clue about is hard, and even harder sometimes to have your google translate open and typing in each phrase or word to find out what they mean. Let alone the trials of trying to get your sim card to work when all the texts are in German, but we got that figured out finally after a few days. The good thing is that I'm good at getting things quickly. But listening to a language that you don't know, but your brain is still trying to translate constantly even though its to no avail is tiring. So therefor, this, my first week here has worn me out.

Add to that that not only is there a morning Mysore program, but there are three night Mysore classes as well. And anyone who knows me well knows I haven't taught an evening class in some years. One a week here and there, but always done before 7pm, because I just don't function well after 7pm. Thinking doesn't happen in my brain I should say after 7pm, but here I'm teaching till 7:30-8 depending on when the students finish. So, I'm tired. But still been able to practice each day, so I'm getting enough sleep. It's just the tiredness from adjusting and functioning in that way again.

I also keep taking wrong trains and having to walk much further than I mean to, but that will come as well. And I will say that I usually walk the whole time in India, and getting that scooter this year made me walking lazy! I love the scooter though, so much fun and nicer to get around to places more quickly, but damn, the walking is killing me now since I got unused to it lol.

Now, all that said. The students are great and make it worthwhile to be there and I love that. It's been over four months since I last taught and now I'm teaching as a teacher authorized to teach by my guru, which is maybe even more of a responsibility, but it also makes me feel happier to teach. And now people who practice with me can apply to also study with Sharath, that makes me even more happy.

So as change happens, it's kind of like growing pains and so the pain is there, but your body is getting bigger. Or your spirit is getting bigger. Things are expanding. However one wants to say it. You can't grow or have expansion of self without the pain of change. So this new experience will be great, is going great already and I can imagine will help me grow more than I expected. I would love to see you here, come visit me!