Training

So I just received my curriculum for the kundalini yoga teacher training that I start this weekend. Reading it I felt excitement, but I also realized I feel nervous about it too!

It dawned on me that I've never taken a training before, not like this. I have never deliberately paid someone to learn from them, thereby admitting that someone knows more about something than I do. LOL. I know, I know, I should be beyond that by now after almost 11 years of practice, but that is what I realized about how I feel about it.

I've used a kundalini yoga practice so intensely for the past two years, to clear out physical issues as well as mental issues, maybe even energetic blockages, to the point that I came to the conclusion that I need to share this with others and then so began, then immediately also realized that I need some more schooling in this area to feel completely comfortable being able to present it well. Not that I'm not presenting well, just that for some reason I don't have all the answers when it comes to this practice. It is very regimented but within that small amount of discipline (small as in time and sequencing for just a bit a day)I have gained more freedom than from any other practice that I've ever done, mainly being ashtanga and Anusara, both variations of hatha yoga.

So now I feel clear most of the time and its an amazing feeling, love it, and its only exponentially expanded when I add in my Sikh sadhana. So, this morning I slept in and then got up and did ashtanga primary series! WTF?!? I have no idea, other than the fact that change is in the air, much change. As per Yogi Bhajan's teachings and the astrological community, the Age of Aquarius is finally coming into play, so thats one huge change. Energy opening up for all of us on a major level. Then there's Mercury that just came out of retrograde today, yet another astrological thingee to contemplate, especially when one thinks of the tumultuousness of the past 3 weeks! Then I turned 40 this year, then I took amrit and became a full-fledged, baptised Sikh. On and on and on . . .

And the changes coming up that I can feel boiling around in the stew of the Universe. Just feel it, maybe I am anxious for those changes to emerge too? Maybe not, who knows. I am allowing it all to unfold as it will and roll, to the best of my ability, with the punches as the saying goes.

I love change, and embrace it, usually anyway, and can observe when its coming on just not too sure normally what form it will take. So I'm anxious, yes, for this next phase in my life and yes, for the other stuff beyond that, but will be okay until it choses to rear its head. And then I'll walk up to it and give it a big hug, tell it I love it and move forward towards the next thing while I incorporate it into my being.

Sat Nam!