New body...

The title of this entry refers to a famous quote from K. Pattabhi Jois, "new body, new body, new body is making..." Which referred to the fact that yoga, maybe this specific practice even, changed you on a cellular level. Your body sweats, detoxifies and evolves as you practice. Even most peoples diet and approach to life change from it. So as cells go they replenish more quickly with all the excess sweat forcing the old cells off the epidermis. Your muscles change, they get strong but also longer and more pliable, along with many other things. I tend to get here and sweat so much here, more than in my former home, and break out. The zits only last about a week but they are annoying and painful, then boom, gone, it may happen again if my diet falters while I'm here but again, goes away fairly quickly. My hair and nails grow faster here, I believe because of the energy flow of the place, there is a LOT of prana here, both in the shala and outside of it. But this is maybe the first time I've experienced the feeling of a new body. I have practiced this path we call Ashtanga Yoga since March 1 of the year 2000. I began primary series and didn't really complete it for two years, when I was on the island of Maui studying with Nancy Gilgoff and Guruji for a week as well. Nancy immediately started me on intermediate series and then began me on advanced A during my time there. Maybe during those weeks I was in less pain, but for the majority of the time I've been engaging in this practice I have hurt. I hurt myself as well and that is why I quit in 2008 and studied Kundalini Yoga and Anusara Yoga, to heal, physically, but also emotionally and spiritually. When I came back to Ashtanga Yoga I was safer, studied with many certified and authorised teachers and began my yearly treks to Mysore, India to study with Sharath, who had taken over guiding the lineage once Pattabhi left his body. But even then, I still hurt all the time. I felt better when I was practicing at home because I would take an extra day off here and there but when here and having to do this 5-6 days in a row each week I was just sore, joints, muscles, one season my SI joint went out, this season I'm having a wrist issue, etc. But this is the first season that I am not sore all the time. I've always been jealous of those people who can just get up daily and practice, no matter what. This is another issue, no segway, sorry. I always have a battle of internal dialogue telling me how awful it is to do this daily, that I'm going to kill myself or worse, going to lose my mind! haha, as if... And the soreness always made my mind choose to do the same as I was doing back home, takes extra days off and such. I felt justified for following my body's needs, yay for me! But was I? Or was I just telling myself that? In some ways both. But this season I'm here, I'm practicing 6 days in a row (okay those in the know, yes I still sometimes skip the Saturday led class to avoid the crowds, but I did go once, but I've practiced at home all but one!) and my body is okay with it. Dare I even say my body feels better than it ever has? Yes, I dare. Because it does! I will also state that Sharath still has me doing mostly only primary series. He's always talking about how important it is for the basics of the body, and now I finally believe him. When I was practicing the first go round I love intermediate and after you practice it you feel just ethereal almost, although I hear this isn't so when you're doing it daily. I was on Nancy's regimen of primary one day, intermediate the next, back and forth. Which was pretty good, so we'll see how it goes if I ever get there again. But for now doing mostly primary and adding on pasasana and the backhanding, it's working and making my body feel great, and my mind feel strong and I'm feeling more open than ever, heart-wise and mind-wise. And I will say I love feeling open, even though I fought hard against it for so many years. No, now it feels great. So whether or not you agree with this, that's fine, but from experience let me tell you to keep practicing. Things change, eventually, physically of course (even though that took the longest for me) but emotionally and mentally especially. Then that's when you can enjoy life a little more. I enjoy going out around town with people, or by myself. Or staying in with people, or by myself. Eating, or not eating. Reading, writing, watching tv shows, scanning social media. All of these things, or none of them, I enjoy doing them, or not doing them. Just being okay with whatever comes up, that's a new thing for me. But yogascittavrttinirodhanah, right?