Sundays

Sundays are my favorite mornings of the week. I get to get up of my own volition, practice at a pace that doesn't feel forced, eat breakfast slowly, go to Starbucks, have a chai and croissant while reading for a good long while and then I tend to go to the park for a walk or to meditate (being cold this morning not sure if these will happen lol) and then I head in to teach a late morning class. Its a great class with mostly long time students who are willing to do the work and chant a bit and then I'm off the rest of the day. Whats not to love about that? A day led at the pace of life that I enjoy, semi-leisurely...

This morning I woke very early and practiced already, have eaten already and so decided to write before I shower and head out. Times like this, where my practice was so deep and my pranayama session so clearing, that now its just quiet, are my favorite of these Sundays. That sense of quiet, even when there's noise, is why I practice. Sure my body feels better, works better and looks better. Sure my mind is clearer and I feel more steady and peaceful. But that quiet is so nice. When you hear a sound and you just hear it, clearly, with no extraneous thought muffling it and then its silent again. I'm experiencing it as I type on this keyboard right now, so nice.

How do people everywhere not engage in the practice of yoga?!? It just makes everything better, not one type of yoga over another either, just anything from the yogic cannon applied to life. It just makes everything fuller, more complete and more fully experienced. I know I'm not alone in this, I'm seeing it more and more lately. In the connections between people in the workshop I taught yesterday, in the people I draw into my life on all accounts, not just in the yoga world.

Everything just seems to be getting clearer, more crystalized and transparent, and to me that brings peace. Maybe not to some. Maybe there is something to this Age of Aquarius stuff, which is now in full swing. We'll see as this week unfolds even further, with New Years Day on Tuesday and beyond.

I love it! I love you! Enjoy yourself today, for your own sake!

Christmas

I'm not a big one for celebrating this holiday, mostly because of what its become. I don't feel the need to buy people tons of stuff to let them know how I feel. If I'm in your presence by my choice, I pretty much think you're awesome, if not I wouldn't be around you!

But I do like the time with family. I am the kind of person that I'm okay with being around the people I like or if I don't see them for a while, I'm okay with that too. Not too attached, and it seemed to have gotten worse during my Kundalini yoga period (I still practice it some, but meaning the time I was only doing it, and doing it a lot). I had gotten to the point I didn't feel like I wanted to see anyone much, or anything, and then was totally fine when I was around people. Now that I've began practicing Ashtanga as my main practice again, I feel differently. I remember when it changed, sometime over the summer, I started feeling my emotions again more fully, not that I allowed them to rule over me, but that I noticed them being in full swing again, and they hadn't been in a little over 3 years.

Now I'm in touch with that again, I've noticed that I'm enjoying being around family again and older friends that I haven't seen in a while. My past is part of what made me who I am now. I can't just disregard it as I was doing, I need to embrace it for what it is, part of the formation of me, as I am right now. And I like that, and I'm glad that I've shifted to this place, its a much nicer place to be.

Its like being okay with everything, not all the time mind you, I am still a work in progress. But the majority of the time being okay with whatever happens, embracing it and moving forward with it. I.E. my family, much of the time, still calls me Keith even though I expressed much displeasure at this, during the time that I was really doing the Kundalini and living fully as a Sikh, wearing the turban and so forth. They do make the occasional effort to call me Sat Inder, and thats great, but I've slowly shifted into being okay with that. I hear it and it doesn't make me cringe as it once did, and its okay. I was that person at one time, I was named that name at birth and for just short of 40 years went by it. It is a part of my history, and a part of me, and remains so, so its okay. Now I still love being called Sat Inder more and am prone to not always hearing Keith when someone says it to me, but its not the end of the world.

I have a friend, Caleb, who said "you know, Sat Inder just seems like he should have long hair and look more Eastern." He's right, I do feel more apt to deserve the name with my long hair, and am growing it back out, full length, I don't know yet, but longer. And I did love my beard long, it was awesome. So I'm heading back that direction.

I also realize that this is one of the goals of a yoga practice, not just an asana practice, but a full yoga practice. To be okay with the polarities of life, something good is fine, something not as good is fine too, you are okay with whatever happens. Acting, not reacting to life.

Its nice to be here, and not saying it will be a stable place. I imagine I'll have to work at it all the time, but thats okay, at least its a bit easier this week, and thats nice.

The following mantra has become my personal mantra lately and what I base my practice around:

Asato ma sat gamaya

Tamaso ma jyotir gamaya

Mrityor ma amritam gamaya

translation;

Lead me from untruth to truth

Lead me from darkness to light

Lead me from death to everlasting life

I use my practice: asana, pranayama, the application of the yamas and niyamas, meditation, all of it; to bring myself to such a level of awareness at all times that I am able to discern the truth in most situations, to see the light in the midst of the darkness of whatever circumstance I happen to be in the middle of and to see myself as a being of spirit, a spirit that will never die, but will continue one once I throw off the chains of this mortal coil and leave this body behind, I will still be moving forward, growing, expanding, yes, even then.

I love this life I've chosen and intend to keep loving it and moving forward and teaching others these teachings I live by so that maybe they will also have similar results and become more conscious and loving and peaceful.

Namaste!

Good morning...

I almost never write in the morning, I'm usually practicing and then after showering and heading to Starbucks. This morning I woke up after sleeping in a bit (didn't sleep too well the night before) and was so sore from my practice yesterday that I decided to just do some pranayama, meditate and chant the Japji and forgo my asana practice until later in the day, maybe before I teach the primary series this afternoon.

So I'm going to go visit my friend in Collinsville for brunch after I go to Starbucks, and enjoy not doing much this morning, which is a rare occurrence.

This Friday is December 21, 2012, the last day on the Mayan calendar and according to astrological terms the beginning, in full, of the Age of Aquarius. Sounds like a big deal huh? I guess it probably is, the energy shifts are palpable these days and seem to be making some people crazy. Especially those who don't practice any yoga or anything strengthening their consciousness, because that helps to integrate all the energy flowing around lately. More and more are waking up and becoming fully involved in life, theirs and others.

But in the teachings of the Law of Attraction as brought through Abraham, the fact that everyone believes something is happening is bringing it forth, and so its self perpetuating? I don't know. I do know that I can feel something going on and more and more people coming to classes and more and more people asking advice on many aspects of life and actually following it, then there are those that are asking and not following it and creating a whole big mess for themselves lol. But thats on them, its time for folks to be taking resposibility for their own actions, happiness and living more consciously, its also time for those of us who are to be compassionate towards those who are trying.

This is my biggest lesson, compassion. I always have been the guy who was like, thats your fault its like that, you made the decisions to lead you that way, but thats not how I'm working to be nowadays. Some people just havent built up the inner strength that I have and need that support system, and I'm making a concerted effort to be that when needed. As much as I can, I am still a work in progress.

This is why my practice is so important to me, and why I make such an effort at disciplining myself to keep up with my practice. Ashtanga most days and kundalini here and there, meditation, pranayama, all of these things. Or rather all of the things that I've discovered, through practicing them, help me in the pursuit of inner happiness and strength. It seems to be working and now is a bit easier, most days. Now that my vata is more balanced I also find that it keeps the focus harder to maintain as well, so being pitta/kapha before was a blessing in disguise, but I do like having more energy from the vata balance, its nice to not be so lethargic.

Harmony Lichty, an authorized Ashtanga teacher from Canada is now in Mysore studying with Sharath and I would love to be there (many of you know that I was trying for a trip in February, that is not happening, thats for another blog, but maybe next fall with my friend Seabrook), but she posted notes from Sundays conference with him and I love reading them because I get inspired in my practice, here is a link to it and if it doesn't work just copy and paste it, http://www.livingbreathingyoga.blogspot.com/.

The problem with being in love with this practice is that there just isn't a community here for it. I have built a small following of folks who come to classes but no one who wants to practice on their own, other than Seabrook, and so knows what that entails and the trials and tribulations of it. That is the biggest reason I want to go to Mysore to study, for the community of it and the immersion in all aspects of the practice, throughout the whole day, not just your time on the mat.

Oh well, it will happen, and sooner rather than later, but I can't lament about it anymore now. I'm happy and want to stay that way today! lol

So the holidays are upon us, all of you enjoy them and be wondeful and peaceful with one another during them, and note the studios schedule changes due to them. One of them being me teaching a big 2 hour Ashtanga led primary series class ending with pranayama on New Years Day, and the 30 day challenge at Yogasource for January.

I wish you all well during this time of change and tradition, much love!

Ashtanga Awareness...

So, I'm practicing this yoga again after a few years off. I really didn't take it off completely, it always creeped its way back in, but I wasn't practicing the 6 days a week and the lifestyle of it and the teachings of Guruji fully, now I am again.

So what happens? Now I'm wanting to teach it again, I am teaching it, but I mean I want to teach it all the time. I like my Align and Flow classes, don't get me wrong and very often I teach the Ashtanga sequencing and focus on one of the aspects of it, one time the breath, today I did uddiyana bandha, sometimes I focus on moola bandha, and I like being able to do that as well. But I really miss teaching the Mysore classes 4-5 days a week like a did before in Collinsville, and also had one led class a week in Edwardsville. It was the best. And when people really get into it and see the benefits of it, its the most rewarding way to teach, really.

I've been teaching it since 2001 and still can't get enough people to take responsibility for their own practice and come, learn the sequence and get the most out of their yoga! Its frustrating. This area is just not into it, they want to be led through their practice, and those who do practice on their own don't necessarily want to practice Ashtanga, not sure what the problem is. The Mysore classes in Chicago are huge, in New York City, multiple schools have huge classes.

Then I think, well, its because I haven't been to India and done the work in the way it needs to be done to make my way toward authorization and certification, but that doesn't matter here either because no one here even knows thats a requirement, they think you did your 200 hours, you're certified. No I'm not, in this tradition you have to get your authorization to teach from the folks in India, which I respect, they just haven't given in to the quick way everyone thinks things need to be done these days.

But even if I go, it won't matter here, people just don't care. SO, I guess I gotta move? But then there's the whole problem of starting all over again. I've taken since 2001 to build up the following I have now, and somewhere else I just have to pay those dues all over again.

Ok, thats my mini rant. I know from studying the Law of Attraction that I have to see and feel myself already having these things I want. Now, here is the problem, I really do want to move, always have, and assume I will until I actually do it. But I'm here and here is cheap, here I have a following, here I have a large community that I've taken 12 years to build, so I don't mind being here, I even like it, love it sometimes too. So, what do I want?!?

I want to teach this practice, so I'm going to. I want to teach it more than I do that, so I'm working on that. I want to go to India and study with Sharath this coming year, so I'm working towards doing that with Seabrook, next fall hopefully. I also know I can't make people love things because I do, but I can be so enthusiastic for it that they get it and want to try it out, even if its just sporadic attendance, so I am going to be that. Also, I'm finding myself wanting to teach Kundalini again, not weekly or daily like before, but maybe monthly. I don't know why, I'm just drawn to these super traditional, set sequence sort of practices, they work for me and my non-traditionalism lol!

Okay, I feel better now! lol, thanks for reading!!!

Openings...

So, anyone who's taken on the Ashtanga Vinyasa system as their practice will understand the title of this post. So no, I'm not referring to a job opening, or a store opening, but an opening that is a physical thing, and a physical thing that translates to a mental thing, and an energetic thing.

Our bodies, from doing the same things over and over again, slowly open. Muscles release from tissues, ribs start to gain more flexibility, bones start to move and many other things. It sounds crazy, but its true, and its very fulfilling because with these openings the energy starts to flow and when the energy is unblocked our lives become unblocked, meaning we have less resistance to things that come up and allow the flow to happen almost all the time.

The problem is, and its not really a problem but anyway, the problem is that when you're going through an "opening" phase, you're sore as fuck lol!!! And then it calms down and if you keep the practice up and don't slack off to allow the soreness to go away, you get the benefits of the opening.

So this week I'm going through an opening period, yesterday was a full moon too so I'm sure the intensity of that added to it, but I was glad for the day off the practice and even practiced some kundalini yoga with a friend, which made me more sensitive to the energetics of this opening period, so very nice it can be, even though its intense.

I've been practicing a bit more kundalini to get really clear as the openings happen, and I do love it even though I'm not immersed in it right now, it is amazing work. Much like the Ashtanga system. They are both tough, regimented practices that are very traditional and those traditions were to cause transformations within the practitioner, so how can I complain? I'm asking for it! lol... Yes I am, and I appreciate and love it even if it is hard sometimes.

I will say this, I've been on with my practices lately, super strong in them, not slacking and this full moon, mercury in retrograde (which just went direct), the way people are acting sooo crazy out there in the world and the intensity of life right now, have seemed less so. And I credit it with me being so strong with them right now, so now I'm seeing another benefit of keeping up these practices that have become so dear to me.

Today, I had a few plans, all of which ended up getting canceled so most of the day I ended up being alone, I took a nap, I watched a movie, I went to the park and meditated in the woods, I read 5 chapters in a book I'm reading. All of these things I've not been satisfied with in the past few weeks, but I kept strong to my practice and now I'm back to being okay with the being alone, feeling fulfilled just with my own company, and happy to be back here because I've always loved my alone time. To not enjoy it for about 3 weeks was hard for me.

So when you find yourself having some down time, do you enjoy it even if you're all by yourself? I think so many folks do not, because they've been raised in an environment of constant stimulation so they aren't sure what to do with themselves when they get that time. So maybe take up some yoga, even just a few times a week. Ideally that will lead you to some meditation too, or if you do some kundalini yoga, it will include active meditations which are great for beginners because it gives your mind something to occupy it and then you can dive deep into yourself, your spirit, and come out on the other side of it calmer, and maybe will enjoy your down time, when you have it.

So the openings in the physical body led me to openings in my mind that led me to openings in my schedule, which allowed me to enjoy the openings in my mind. The mental openings equate to a feeling of peace to me. Space to just be, with the trees in the woods, with the words in the book I'm reading and the images that came up in my mind from those words, with the friends I had lunch with and the conversation we had, or coloring with their daughter on her childrens menu, with the warmth of the sun as it beat down on my skin on this warmer of days we seem to be having this fall, and now as I sit and write this for you, and for me too.

Ok, love to you all, now to go be present with some Vampire Diaries! LOL

Sunday night

So, I've not been inspired to write in a while. Writing to me has to flow and come out naturally, instinctually, but I haven't been having that regularly now for a few months. I've sat down and tried to make myself write, but that always starts out icky and just gets ickier, but I've still posted some of them.

This weekend I worked on one teacher training, and then another. Both were great, I love teaching all these people that are wanting to share yoga with others just as it was shared with them. But I also started thinking...

There are so many teacher trainings going on right now, and I'm a believer in abundance so I'm not concerned having so many teachers around because I believe there is enough to go around. The problem, if you want to call it a problem, is that most people have no business teaching. Lots of them have practiced for a very short time and not dug in deep enough to their own practice yet, if they even maintain a self practice, and/or studied with a teacher, one teacher, for very long. And I know that once upon a time the student stayed with the teacher and maybe lived apart from them, but studied with them sometimes for years before they gave them the okay to go out and teach. It may even still be that way in India, but I don't know.

I do think the Western approach has expanded and grown the Eastern teachings exponentially, so in that respect I think its a great thing, but then our Western way of doing everything too quickly and with less integrity has also infected the process, and that may not be such a good thing. I do believe that everything is working out just the way its meant to be working out and so its all good, but I can have these thoughts and its okay, I've made my peace with it.

I think the main concern I have is that I'm seeing so many come through, who are not practicing yoga as a mainstay in their life. They're still saying they don't have enough time and taking a class when they can fit it in, rather than using the teachings to create a practice of their own, on their own, not in a led class. And yes, I do think thats an important part of the process. How can you integrate and grow and expand when you're always pushing outwardly, rather than using your practice to go inside and dig in deep to that inner being. When you have to stay external to listen to a teacher it just doesn't happen, sure you can have some amazing experiences anyway, but not go in deep.

I don't know, maybe I'm making too much out of it. I seem to be unable to make up my mind on anything right now, so maybe this is just another symptom of that? I cut my hair, I cut my beard, both after taking vows not to. I now all weekend have had the urge to clipper my hair off really short, while letting my beard grow long, even though I know I'll hate it because I like it longer in the winter. I'm having trouble practicing because of tightness around my sciatic nerve (that I also went through the first time I practiced ashtanga, but once it went away it was gone for good) so the practice has been slow and not a full series lately, so I'm sure thats affecting me too, I've just been plain busy too this past week, which will change this week because of the holiday. I've also had a weird headache the past two days which isn't something I've had since I smoked back in 2000.

I don't know, its all good, I feel amazing most of the time and am relaxed most of the time and happy most of the time, so whats my problem?

Who knows, I'm fine, I know that, or am I not??? Maybe I'm crazy and all of this is shit and doesn't matter??? Maybe? LOL

Thats enough of my crazy for the night, take care all and remember, don't pay any attention to anything I say on here. I don't know a damn thing! Never have, and never will!!!

.......

Another weekend is coming to a close, this one was a bit different in that I started it off teaching the Happy Hour class at Prana that I set up to teach a while back but have had obligations since then and only was able to once. I had 6 people, it was a fun class. Then Saturday I taught the teacher trainees at Yogasource all day long, it being the last weekend we took it kind of easy, had a nice lunch and got out early, and then today they graduated. It was my first experience training teachers and I have to say I loved and they were a great group. We're going to set up a community class for them to teach at Yogasource on Sundays so they can get the experience of teaching, I think it will go over well. I'm re-reading Kino's book Sacred Fire and getting all inspired to dedicate myself to Ashtanga Yoga again, as my path, not just as a path but as my path. I've decided to change most of my classes over, keeping only my Sunday class as Align and Flow, I haven't decided when but that doesn't necessarily matter yet since I'm teaching most of them using that sequencing already. But dedicating myself to it seems like it lines up all my energy in one direction, not scattering it all about and wasting it. It feels right. There's just so much to it and talking with people who are taking the classes and/or practicing it as their main practice it just solidifies it in my being that there is so much power in it. Doing the same thing over and over until you get the opening, the space and the flow through that area of the body and then moving forward, adding on one asana at a time is just so wise. I love it! So I didn't finish yesterday, so now its Monday and the weekend has already come to a close, sorry, had a late dinner with some lovely friends and got home and got in bed to read then fell asleep early. Today I went to practice, then teach the Mysore class, then had breakfast and a mani/pedi after, very nice! I don't get them terribly often and so I feel spoiled lol. I know, I know, I am spoiled but I create a great life for myself, I do! So, lots of thoughts and processing stuff floating around through my mind so I'm not too sure where I was intending to go when I started this entry yesterday, so I'm going to close and come back to it later this week or weekend. I'm going to visit a good friend of mine from my Kundalini training down in Southwest Missouri Thursday thru Saturday and then come home to see Pilobolus perform, so it may not be until early next week, but I've got a lot going on in there, so there is much to come out, so I promise to write again soon. Much love to you all! Change your mind right now, chose to be happy and positive even in the midst of adversity and struggle, its hard but sooooo worth it!!!